So a few weeks ago I had my first virtual family court hearing. And, you know what? I kind of liked it. It’s no secret that COVID-19 has changed many things about our daily life. I mean, our kids now go to school online, many of us buy our groceries online, and we keep in touch with our families online. People have even been hosting Zoom weddings! So, why shouldn’t the court system be online as well?

On any given day, there could be hundreds of people working and litigating their cases in a courthouse. So, when the stay at home orders were first issued, court systems were virtually shut down to keep people away from one another. Hearings were cancelled and people wondered if they could even get divorced during COVID-19 or have a COVID related custody issue resolved. Did you experience a delay in your divorce case during this time?

5 Must have tips for your virtual family court hearing

However, closing the court system for a long period of time is not sustainable. Families need to have their cases heard and resolved, especially in areas like child custody and support. So, many courts are now moving to virtual court proceedings to move cases forward. Has your family court system moved to having virtual family court hearings as well?

While I’ve previously given advice about how to handle your first family court hearing, attending a hearing virtually brings some new challenges to families and their attorneys. I mean, going to court is scary enough, add in a new system, yikes! But don’t worry, I got you!

Here are my 5 must have tips for your virtual family court hearing:

  • Make sure that you have the right hardware;
  • Comply with all the rules;
  • Dress appropriately;
  • It’s still court, act like it; and
  • Decide how you are going to communicate with your attorney during the hearing.

Make sure that you have the right hardware for your virtual family court hearing.

One of the biggest concerns about the court system going virtual is the parties ability to participate in the process. Pre COVID-19, you only had to show up to the courthouse to present your case (with evidence and a solid argument of course). While documents and arguments are still required for a virtual family court hearing, you also need to make sure that you have the right tools as well. Do you know what those right tools are? Don’t worry, I’ll tell you.

First, let’s start with the hardware. Make sure that you have a strong internet connection wherever you plan on being for your virtual family court hearing. Is your connection at home not so great? You may want to consider going to your attorneys’ office (if that is an option) or another location where the signal is better. There is nothing worse than being 10 minutes into a trial only to have your face frozen and your connection dropped. Trust me, this was my biggest fear during my first virtual family court hearing.

In addition to having a strong internet connection, I highly recommend that you participate in your virtual family court hearing by computer as opposed to using your mobile phone. By using your computer, you will be able to see the judge, the other party, and the lawyers (if there are any) all at the same time. It just makes for a better experience in my opinion. Also, you won’t have to break your wrist trying to hold your phone up for hours. Talk about sore!

Finally, make sure that you download and understand how to use the program that the court is using to conduct the virtual family court hearing. While the county that I mainly practice in is using Zoom, a neighboring county is using Microsoft Teams. A third county is using Bluejeans (and not the Jordache type). Did you know that all of these video conferencing options existed before COVID-19? Me neither.

While you won’t likely need to learn how to use all these programs for your virtual family court hearing (unless you are an attorney reading this), make sure that you have dowloaded the program that your court system is using and practice with it. The court will likely initiate the link but you still need to know how to use it and, you may need to have an account with the court’s chosen provider.

I hate when I can’t get something to work and start to get flustered. Are you like me? If you are then you know that there is nothing worse than the fear of not understanding how to log in when you are already nervous about the outcome of the hearing itself. Save yourself the stress and practice, practice!

Comply with all the rules for the virtual family court hearing.

If you’ve ever been to court before, or, heck, watched a legal drama, you know that a court hearing has rules. Well, it is likely that your virtual family court hearing will have some additional requirements. What could those be? Here are some ideas.

My first virtual family court hearing was a custody trial. We were required to submit all our proposed exhibits to a specific email address for the judge 48 hours in advance. Why? Because we would not be able to hand them to her like we normally would in person. Does you virtual family court hearing require something like this? Not sure? Find out.

Second, what about recording the session? In my experience you are not allowed to record the virtual family court hearing and doing so would come with major consequences. Interested in recording yours? Make sure you are allowed to do so before you turn the red light on.

Third, does your case have witnesses? Are they allowed to be present with you while you testify? Do they need to log in separately? What about kids for a custody trial? How will they testify? Look up the rules on all this as well.

Comply with all the rules for the virtual family court hearing.

You may be saying to yourself, but Liz, how will I find out these rules? In my experience, the judge’s staff may send them with the notice for the hearing. Most judges understand that we are all going through this for the first time and, they want to make sure that the virtual family court hearing runs as smoothly as possible.

However, if you don’t receive any rules from the judge’s chambers, make sure that you check the Court’s website as they are likely posted there. If they are available to the public, you will be required to follow them so make sure you read through them a few times to know what your obligations are.

You must still dress appropriately for your virtual family court hearing.

I can not tell you how many funny lawyer stories I have heard about people not dressing appropriately for virtual family court hearings during COVID-19. I mean, one lawyer thought he could participate from his bed. Without a shirt on. What?? While I got a great laugh out of them, I don’t want you to become one! So, what should you do?

You know the saying, “dress the part”? Well, dress the part. If you wouldn’t wear it to the courthouse for your in person family court trial, don’t wear it to your virtual family court hearing! It’s that simple. Just because you are participating in this hearing from your living room or kitchen table doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t take it seriously. And part of that is dressing as if you are. So, put on your court clothes and turn on your computer.

Not sure what you should wear to court? Don’t worry, I got you! In fact I wrote a whole article about it last year. Check it out here.

Are you thinking, but Liz, do I really have to wear a suit to sit at my dining room table? Yes, that is what I am saying. But you can wear slippers if you want.

A virtual family court hearing is still court, act like it!

Even though it may seem a little weird to participate in a custody trial from your living room, you need to do your best to act as if you are in the courtroom. How do you do this? Don’t worry, I have some ideas about this as well.

First, set yourself up in a quiet and comfortable location free from distractions. Turn off the TV and the notifications on your phone. I suggest using a home office or your kitchen table if available. If you have children in the home, try to participate in you virtual family court hearing in a location that is far away from them. And their little ears. Children don’t generally come to the courthouse for a reason.

A virtual family court hearing is still court, act like it!

Worried about participating in your family court hearing at your house? See if you can do so at your attorney’s office. For example, for my virtual custody trial, I had my client sit in a different conference room and participate from there. This way I could make sure that he was prepared, on time, and his kids couldn’t hear what he was saying.

If you will be testifying, remember that the same rules apply for a virtual family court hearing as they would in person. That means that you can’t bring up notes to the “stand” and no one can help you. In fact, if you are found to be using aids that would not be allowed in person, you could get in big trouble. Don’t do it.

Finally, and most importantly, take the hearing just as seriously as you would if it was in person. Be respectful to the other side and the judge. Don’t swear. Don’t chew gum. Sit up straight. Don’t eat your lunch during your cross-examination. It may sound simple but you’d be surprised at how the location, or lack thereof, can make the hearing feel less serious. As such, people think they can do things they would never do in person. You can’t. So don’t.

Decide how you are going to communicate with your attorney during the virtual family court hearing.

My last tip applies if you will have a lawyer for your virtual family court hearing. If you are represented by counsel, you and he/she need to develop a game plan for how you are going to talk to each other during the virtual family court hearing. What do I mean by that? Let me explain.

I am not talking about conversing with your lawyer during the hearing itself. That is still a no no. I’m talking about when you would talk to him or her alone as if you were in person and you want to confer about what is happening. This is usually after the lawyers conference with the judge or on breaks. This is easy if you are in person, right? I mean, how many courthouse scenes have you seen where a lawyer and their client are in the hallway talking about what to do next?

But what will the “hallway” be in your virtual family court hearing? Will you text? Get on the phone and call each other on breaks to discuss strategy? While some programs such as Zoom have private chat functions, I find those aren’t the same as face to face and I worry a little about their true privacy. So, while this an option, I personally do not feel comfortable using it.

This was the main reason that I had my client come to my office to participate in our custody trial. On breaks he and I were able to mask up and talk in my big boardroom social distancing style. If you are going to be speaking to your attorney in person during your virtual family court hearing, make sure that you either log out of the hearing room link or turn off your video and audio so no one else can hear what you are saying. The other side made the mistake in forgetting to do that in my custody trial. They only realized it when the judge’s clerk told them to turn off their sound. Yikes!

So, if this is an option for your and your attorney I highly recommend it. If not, I suggest taking notes during the trial and sending them to your lawyer via email or text so that they have them when needed, such as cross-examination of the other side. Whatever method you choose, make sure you think about how you are going to communicate with one another before you log in to start your virtual family court hearing.

So what are my major tips for your virtual family court hearing?

COVID-19 has brought a lot of changes to our lives, including moving family court hearings online! Keep in mind these 5 tips so that you can successfully participate in your virtual family court hearing:

  • Make sure that you have a strong internet connection, a computer and the right video conferencing software;
  • Does your court have unique rules for virtual family court hearings? Find out as soon as possible;
  • Make sure that you dress as if you are going to the courthouse and not just sitting at your dining room table;
  • Remember that this is still a court proceeding and to conduct yourself accordingly; and
  • If you have an attorney, decide how you are going to communicate with him or her during the hearing if you are not going to be in the same location.

As always, please continue to stay safe, stay sane, and most importantly, keep washing your hands!!!

What’s next on the Divorce Lawyer Life?

It’s no secret that divorces are one of the hardest things a person will ever experience. But there are things that you can do to make the process less painful and expensive. Want to know what they are? Tune in next week to get my 5 steps to a great divorce. I promise you will not want to miss this one!

Want to make sure that you don’t miss any of my tips and tricks for navigating the divorce process post-Coronavirus and beyond? Make sure that you sign up for my weekly newsletter where I recap the week’s articles and provide some additional promos and content just for my subscribers. You’ll get a FREE post-divorce checklist just for signing up!

Or, have you just separated from your spouse and don’t know what to do first? Or after that? It can be difficult to determine where to start first. Don’t worry, I got you! Get my FREE checklist for what to do when you are newly separated. You don’t want to miss it!